Wow today I have alot to be grateful for. (well everyday I do but today I am much more appreciative of what I have.)
First and formost I am so completely grateful for four healthy children. For anyone who has been following Gracie's blog knows that she was welcomed back into her Heavenly Father's arms yesterday. Although I have never met her or her family I have not been able to get them out of my mind. I think I originally found their story so endering because Annabelle and Gracie were so close in age and the youngest of four children. I can not stop thinking about what if that was my child. Could I be as brave in the face of adversity as this courageous family? I'd like to think so but I am pretty sure my answer is no. This mom is an amazing source of strength and faith. It is unbelievable to me how she survives! Here I am sitting on my pitty pot of Annabelle being sick...and this mom is dealing with the impending death of her almost one year old. I cannot even fathome her faith. But as I sit and ponder about this family, I have renewed gratitude for the plan of salvation. I am grateful that we can be together again after this life. I would be heartbroken if one of my children passed away in this life before me but I am grateful for the knowledge that I know I will see them again. How tragic it would be if I did not know these things. I keep thinking of when I was pregnant with Jayden my mom was teaching first grade. She had a girl in her class who had an anyerism (i know i spelled that wrong.) in her sleep and died. In Jewish custom they believe that the last mitzvah (kind thing) you can do for your loved ones is to bury them with your own hands. Instead of having the cemetery personnal move the dirt back on the coffin, each person at the funeral takes part in shoveling the dirt on their loved one. Also Jews do not believe in an after life. They believe that this life is all you get. I was at the funeral of this sweet innocent 6 year old. To hear the first shovel full of dirt drop on the coffin is still the most haunting hollow sound I have ever heard in my life. I can still 14 years later remember with sadness the heartwrenching sound. I hope I will never have to bury one of my children but I cannot imagine burying my child thinking I would never see them again. I am grateful for each day I have with my children. Because of Grace I will be a little more kind, a little more patient, give a few more hugs and a little less judgement. I have been reminded again how fragile life is. I am trying to live each day to the fullest.